Over the past four years (maybe even longer) I have wasted hundreds of hours of my short life on the internet phenomenon known as Facebook....Mark Zuckerberg has created a mind-numbingly entertaining site, along the same lines as reality television, but it's my reality! I actually know these people. I know who is dating who, who just lost a job, what concert that one girl I met in Biology class sophomore year of college is going to tonight, and that my friends in Korea are all annoyed with their co-workers whining on the phone for hours on end. I don't know howI survived the first 20 years of my life without this vital knowledge...But I thank the powers that be that I now have a way to wile away hours of time doing utterly pointless things, like writing a list of 25 things about myself. Which I did yesterday, and I feel kind of like a loser for doing it. But hey, I've been at work for five days and taught a whopping 2 classes and washed some windows. Here is what I wrote:
1. My unwarrented stubbornness kept me from filling out a "25 random things" earlier. That, and I am slightly afraid of overtly bragging about myself. My cousin Piddy's note was my breaking point.
2. Contradiction and hypocrisy play into my life in far too high of a degree.
3. People seem to really like my “style” I thank my mother for that. She’s a cool lady.
4. My writing abilities outshine my speaking abilities, a frustrating fact that I faced and tried to deal with a long time ago. However, it continues to aid in me questioning myself in social situations and conversations…
5. If I eat broccoli, asparagus, pineapple or bananas I am crippled over in pain for the next two hours. My step mom has the same exact problem, kind of weird. (sadly, pineapple, broccoli and asparagus used to be my favorite fruit and vegetables…).
6. Puppies in the grass, running babies (they don’t bend their knees!), incense in a window, great tunes, trees in the breeze, birds chirping in the morning and a nice patch of grass to sit on all make me very happy.
7. I could never date anyone who didn’t like Led Zeppelin.
8. I was a varsity pole-vaulter in my younger days.
9. At this very moment, the largest boutonniere I have ever seen is safety pinned to my sweater—special decoration for Korean Middle School Graduation which I must go to NOW. “bali bali” (Korean for “fast fast”) can kiss my lazy white ass.
10. I have returned…I almost fainted during the ceremony, which brings me to number
11. I have a fainting problem. When my heart rate drops, my blood pressure drops too (they are supposed to balance each other out). Victoria's secret, my grandpa's church and a Phil Lesh Show at the Eagle's Ballroom have all witnessed my fainting spells.
12. My best thoughts are formed during those lingering moments between my waking and sleeping hours.
13. Twilight thought from the other day: Look at a picture of the solar system, or a galaxy, now look at a picture of an atom. They look remarkably similar don't they? Now, I'm no scientist, but I think it's equally as plausible for life to exist on other planets and galaxies as it is for a little miniature world to exist in an atom floating around in the air we breath, or that ring on your finger or the water you rinse with in the morning. Maybe, we, as all powerful humans, just haven't been able to view things on such a microscopic level. In turn, we could be part of a miniature world floating on some giants head as hair gel or something. This brings up the whole time thing, a day for the giant whose hair gel we live in could be 2 billion years for us, while 2 billion years for the galaxy in your drinking water could be a split second for us….okay, I'm sounding crazy now, I'll stop.
14. I really, really, really like to climb things...like really, really a lot. I want to climb El Capitan in the next 5-10 years (I have to step up my climbing regimen many fold if this is going to happen)
15. When I first came to Korea, I was disheartened with the fact that I didn’t really miss anything, that has changed though. I miss my family—unbearably at times—Beaner, Bryant, Piddy, Steph, Nola, mom, dad, Patty, the rest of the cousins, aunts and uncles, I owe you more than you could ever know, and I cannot wait to see you guys in person. Skype rocks my world.
16. I would love to hang out in a Madison, Wisconsin living room with big couches and all the boys and girlies. (Alice, Ali, Ari, Jamie, Jenna, Jess, Jen, Jon, hot john, Joris, J-man, Stef, Sarah, Sam, Seth, Phallix, Pat—I fucking miss you guys, and I love that almost all of us have names that start with J, S or A).
17. Red wine, good beer and good bud. Enough said (necessary additions to #16)
18. When I grow up I wanna be a writer.
19. I also want to live in the mountains, off the grid, with a nice vegetable garden, a place to climb, and a hammock next to a stream.
20. I truly believe that my purpose in life is to protect the environment and teach others to do the same—something I find very hard to do in Korea.
21. Organized religion, while fascinating, gives me a headache. Forget the labels and just be a good person. God, Allah, Buddha, the Great Mother, whoever…if there is some big talking head up there, they will let in the atheist with good morals before the evangelical Christian who abuses homosexuals and bombs abortion clinics. Furthermore, I think we live among gods and goddesses. I am one, and you probably are too.
22. Extreme feats of engineering, like air conditioned streets in Dubai, man made islands in the shape of sea creatures, and cars that can go really fast, read your mind and wipe your ass do not impress me in the least. Rather, I am inspired by people going into impoverished lands, building water tanks and educating the forgotten and ignored.
23. Creation and Inspiration are high on my hypothetical list of life goals.
24. Come tomorrow or next week, I am going to read this and not agree with at least a quarter of what I’ve written.
25. Thanks for reading, I know I tend to ramble when it comes to writing.
26. I could write waaayyyy more than 25 of these, but I’ll just go to number
27. because I don’t really like the numbers 25 or 26.
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